"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain."

"When I am happy I feel like crying, but when I am sad I don't feel like laughing. I think it is better to be happy; then you get two feelings for the price of one."

"Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse."

"Why is it when we talk to God we're praying -- but when God talks to us, we're schizophrenic?"

"Ninety-eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hard-working, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then--we elected them."

"What's reality anyway? Nothing but a collective hunch."

"Does the imagination dwell the most upon a woman won or a woman lost?"

"But all endings are also beginnings. We just don't know it at the time."

"Creative power, is that receptive attitude of expectancy which makes a mold into which the plastic and as yet undifferentiated substance can flow and take the desired form."

"How should they answer?"

"Excessive literary production is a social offense."

"I trained for three years at drama school to be an actor - not a celebrity."